just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize
