wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
