Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize