Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
