It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I need to align my fucking chakras
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
