love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
