and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
