whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
