the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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