I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
Randomize
