A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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