just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
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