Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I have tasted many bathrooms
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
