I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
