I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
The feeling are messing with the penis
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
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