Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
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