butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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