This phone does not accept mass texts. Try again.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize