I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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