problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Randomize
