i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Can i not drive my cunt home
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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