the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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