Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
