Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
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