Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
