If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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