farters have to be the big spoon...
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
