Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Randomize