Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
