just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
This is classic penis vs brain.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
