is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
We need to get me chipped asap
Congratulations! We have a period
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