all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
