do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Randomize
