My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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