how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
