im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Randomize
