I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
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