i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize