Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
