I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
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