i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
