Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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