So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
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