if i died would you start the facebook group?
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
Randomize
