He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
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