im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
