like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
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