Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
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