how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
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