you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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