i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize