Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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